When we discern that other people are not growing spiritually and allow that discernment to turn to criticism, we block our fellowship with God. God never gives us discernment so that we may criticize, but that we may intercede.

My Utmost for His Highest – Oswald Chambers

Read this this morning and just needed to share this struggle of mine in hopes to encourage you and others to intercede.

tola’at shani- Crimson Worm

 Although never thinking this was possible, I am as excited about this worm as Harry and Lloyd were about their worm farm in “Dumb and Dumber”, which many of you will recall was cleverly named “I Got Worms.”

After hearing from Aaron Keyes a couple weeks ago about this worm, I have been obsessed with learning more about it and following it on a wild goose chase.

The tola worm is a worm that shows up in the Old Testament several times and is used in several different ways.  It’s first and perhaps most prominent place is found in Psalm 22- the prophetic Messianic psalm in which David describes the crucifixion.  If you just want to stop and read this Psalm a few times, that may be even better than continuing on with this blog post.  It is so good and God’s word is always going to be better than reading second hand about the scriptures; straight from the source.  I digress…  The tola verse is verse 6:

 But I am a worm (tola) and not a man,
     scorned by men and despised by the people.

 So if this written in Christ’s perspective, since we know this didn’t happen to David- Jesus is calling Himself a worm.  That’s not very encouraging, right?  ‘Yeah, my Savior, He thinks He’s just a worm- He’s awesome though.’

 But if we learn just a bit about this particular worm, maybe this will make more sense.

 The tola worm is quite rare and is normally only found in Israel and the surrounding areas.  In ancient and Old Testament times, the worm was actually harvested and used to dye the elaborate garments prescribed by God and worn by the Israelite priests, royal garments, and other temple decorations. 

When several thousand of these grubs were mature; fully grown, then they were crushed to death.  Out of the crushed bodies of those grubs would flow a deep red blood, which was used for a dye.  When cloth or clothes were washed in this dye, they would be dyed a beautiful crimson red.  This lovely color never faded, and could never be washed out or removed.  I’m sure you can see where this is going…

 The tola, like may insects, is a larvae first but in order to reproduce climbs onto a tree and attaches itself there.  In Israel, you will most commonly find them on the Israeli Oak trees (I won’t get into the countless Oak tree references in the Bible).  The tola attaches itself and remains there until death whereby it leaves a scarlet stain on the tree.  But perhaps it’s biggest purpose on the tree is to lay it’s eggs.  As the tola dies, its sticky blood covers and incubates the eggs.  As the babies are hatched, the mature tola is there for the babies to eat.  All that remains is the scarlet, crimson stain on the tree.  Are you ready for the best part?

 After 3 days, the scarlet stain drys and turns white and flakes off the tree like snow!

Isaiah 1:18-

“…though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.”

What an amazing picture of Christ on the cross- the tree- the oak of righteousness.  Willingly attaching Himself to the tree unto death, so that we, God’s sons and daughters, might have life. 

 Hebrews 2:10

For it was fitting for Him, for whom are all things and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons to glory, to make the captain of their salvation perfect through sufferings.

If He didn’t do that, we would not be able to stand up under the law of God.  His blood covers us so that we might live and stand righteous.   He incubates and shelters us with His blood.

 2 Corinthians 5:21

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

Even down to the eating of the mother.  That Christ invites us to partake in the communion of His body through the sacrament of the bread and wine (grape juice).

 Luke 22:19-20

 19And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.”

 20In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.

Even the literal use of the worm in Old Testament times- to make the priestly garments is amazing.  That the blood of the tola was used to make the priestly garments and now we are called priests- able to enter in to God’s most Holy place in His presense:

Revelation 1:5-6

⁵and from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, the firstborn from the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth.

   To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood, ⁶and has made us to be a kingdom and priests to serve his God and Father—to him be glory and power for ever and ever! Amen.

How humbling to describe yourself as a worm.  But Christ knew that the description would come to life in years to come and some 2000 years later as people began to look deep into God’s word for the hidden treasures.   But Jesus’ description isn’t surprising- it’s exactly His character.  The first has become last- a servant to all…

Hope this blessed you as much as it did me.  More worm stuff to come…

I recently spoke at my church in the morning based on a quick teaching I prepared.  I was going to write out what I learned, but since it’s recorded- you can listen to it here.  (it’s only about 7 minutes, so I figured you can listen faster than you can read)

Go down to the 10/18 by Matt Reynolds sermon on Numbers 27  - the message of the Armor Bearer is at the beginning.  The rest of the message is incredible and if you have time, LISTEN- but I figured this may be the best format for everyone to take in.  Let me know if you would like clarification…

Be blessed… working on a post about WORMS, so if you track with me, be excited.

I think it goes without saying that I haven’t been faithful to keeping up with this blog.  It’s been tough because my times of intentional ministry have been replaced with learning and developing community with the guys I’m living with and house church.  My desire has been to reach out to my direct community- a.k.a neighbors, but with the exception of some prayer walks, I feel less than a steward of my time in Home Park, downtown Atlanta thus far.

This past week I asked God to rip me from my monastery of Godly men to really be intentional in the city.

The whole situation started when a brother of ours, Craig’s, father slipped, broke his hip and then had a stroke.  Craig is a bit older but came into house church crying and asked that someone might bring him to his dad.  Since he doesn’t have a vehicle, one of my roomate’s, Greg, took him over there, while as a community we began praying for him.

Over the past week, Craig has needed rides and I have taken him a few times; but the last time I took him- I didn’t like what was really in my heart.  I was thinking to myself, “Why am I the only one he calls?  Can’t he find someone else to take him?  There are tons of other guys that live around the church…  He’s probably going to ask me for money too.  Am I going to have to wait for him to bring him back or pay for his bus?”  Wow, Nathan, way to be a brother.  But God had other plans.

I took Craig to his father which was in a new location, a rehab facility.  The truth is, it didn’t seem like much rehab was going on there rather a place that families had designated for those in their family who were mentally ill or severely handicapped.  I walked in and all these older and perhaps crazy people were scooting around in wheelchairs.  It was kind of funny for a second.  I’m walking the halls and it was as if this spirit of hopelessness slapped me in the face as if to say: ‘you’re powerless here.’  It was no doubt intimidating, but as we made our way through the maze of rooms with lifeless bodies staring at impersonal TVs, I began to pray against any strong holds and an opportunity to be of use here.

We met Craig’s dad, Harold, and had a great conversation with him and prayed powerfully for him only to find out he couldn’t hear anything cause he’s partially deaf- again I think God has a bit of a sense of humor to take me down a notch from thinking that someone has to hear my prayer to be blessed or the inflection in my voice is going to move God any more.

Craig decided to stay and did need some money for the bus so I left him and his father to catch up.  As I left, I waved and smiled in the direction of several people who seemed to only be shells of who they might have been.  Words almost fighting to come out or ask if they knew me.  Clearly haunted, I made the last turn and passed the chapel of the building and locked eyes with an individual who was in the worst shape I had seen anyone in.  The person was laying down and I could see his feet were horizontal with the floor as if a boulder had smashed him.  White sheets covered him head to toe- the only thing showing was his face draped with towels like a Muslim woman and his clean basketball hightops.  Again I smiled, waved and walked on.  I walk out to my truck with a sigh of relief to be out of such a depressing place when Mr. Conviction taps me on the shoulder via His Holy Spirit.

“Did you know you were supposed to pray for him?”

“Well, it crossed my mind… I was afraid you were going to say that.” I replied to myself

“Well, it would be nice if you did…”

“But God, now I’m going to have to go back and that’s embarassing kind of because I didn’t it the first time.” I pled.

“Well, then you’re be all the more less likely not to do it the first time I tap you on the shoulder”

So that kind of settled it…

I walked in and the voice from under the sheets mumbled, “so you want to talk?”

“Well, yeah, can I sit down?”  I said a bit startled.

“Can you get me something to spit into?” he said.  I immediately jumped for a nurse to help us.  All the nurses started asking each other to get a cup.  Frustrated, I found a cup myself about 5 feet away and brought it in.  He asked me to hold it up to his mouth.  Clearly paralyzed, he struggled to move his lips against the cup and spit about 3 oz worth (a quarter of a coke can).  He apologized for me having to see that.  That’s when the first line of tears fought to break the surface tension of my eyes.

-please, Lord, don’t let him see me cry…-

After that, I officially met Freddie Castle.  He is 27 and has been there for a few years.  He was from Norcross and Snellville areas.  We talked about his past, his involvement with gangs (the beginning of his downfall).  In seventh grade he joined, which I found out is late for most (5th grade is pretty common!).  From there he focused on sports and excelled in school when it was convenient- which was really only during football season.  I could tell he was so smart.  His gang involvement made it slightly inconvenient to apply himself.

He talked of his first and only love, how he proposed to her with a promise ring when 17.  He then talked of his accident.  While with 3 others: his best friend, his girlfriend/fiance’, and her friend, a gun was pulled out on them from members of a rival gang who were hitting on the girls.  Freddie challenged them to shoot but they didn’t and drove off.  Freddie’s best friend, a bit hot headded, drove after them.  Going way too fast, Freddie pleaded for his friend to slow down and not try to cut across traffic to make a seemingly impossible exit.  His friend didn’t listen and this sent their car into a violent side spin, side over side (I envisioned Casino Royale when he told me).  Freddie was thrown out of the car- out of his seatbelt.  His friends escaped with minor injuries.

None of them speak to Freddie anymore.

A bit after the accident, the driver came to see Freddie and said, “you don’t blame me for this do you?”

What do you say to that?  Freddie, now paralyzed from the neck down, I believe wrestles with this.  He sustained burned and serious glass cuts over his body.  I could only see his face because he shivers with cold sweats eternally.  He covers up because he’s so cold, but this makes his skin sweat profusely.  After we were better acquainted, he had me wipe his sweat ever 5-10minutes or so.

During this time, his nurse asked if he wanted to eat dinner.  He did and then said to the nurse, “don’t worry, Nathan is going to feed me.”   I am?  ”I am, he’s right.”  I have never fed an adult before.  I have never felt that level of humility before- feeding Freddie, wiping his mouth, and drying him off.  Rest assured, the tears are now assaulting my eye lids and I don’t think I can hold it together.  I’m forced to do the “I’m-a-man-watching-a-sad-movie-nonchalant-saltwater-in-the-eyes-shoulder-side-wipe.”

The evening ended 3 hours later, just in time for me to go get Craig and bring him home.  The night wouldn’t end before, with bended knees in the hallway, Craig and I prayed bold prayers of healing and forgiveness over Freddie.  We hugged and left.  I promised to come back and bring his favorite drink- powerade or root beer, which if any of you know me know that Freddie will be receiving the greatest root beer in the world- “Virgil’s.”

So, God dealt with me.

I pray that he deals with me more and I pray I’m available and can listen long enough to hear His Spirit speak to me.  Perhaps this faithfulness is cultivated.

1 Corithians 4:1-3

So then, men ought to regard us as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the secret things of God. Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself.

This is apostleship- being sent ones to the places that don’t know Christ’s love or His redemption and healing.

Let’s not be a paralyzed body of Christ- where the body doesn’t do what the head is wanting it to.

Last week I had the pleasure of going to a Lecrae concert.  Who is Lecrae?  Well, him and his 116 clique put on a show at the World Congress Center.  The term “clique” is a clear sign of a rap group of some sort and although my affinity for hard core rap has changed over the years, these guys managed to reach down into my love of old hip hop via Biggy, Tupac, Busta Rhymes, and Outkast and redeem this genre of music and poetry.  The only thing that is different is what they rap about and for them… it’s the King.  

These guys have a radical love for Christ and do not sugar coat their words in order to sell records.  They have sold out, but not to media and the music industry.  In one of their songs, “Send Me” it talks about him going to China and seeing people persecuted for their faith.  In the chorus, it gets real masculine with a “Send me, I’ll Go” chant.  Lecrae stops the music and asks the crowd: “Do you really mean that? …or are you jumping around (the floor was literally bouncing) and shouting because you think you’re supposed to or you neighbor is?… Maybe, this is more of a picture of your walk with Christ – fake, and just for show.”  Are you serious? Everyone just received a punch in the stomach from God in that moment.  A favorite preacher of mine would say in that moment, “If you can’t say amen, you gotta say ‘ouch.’”  Needless to say there was a lot of ‘ouching’ that night. 

A light fell down on two people.  They stopped the show and everyone prayed for them.  They them asked for forgiveness and prayed for all the people at the World Congress Center and for the favor of the management there.  Not your average Hip Hop Concert.

The reason they were doing this was for a kick off of the Blueprint Church (you gotta check out their site- one of the best videos featuring Atlanta I’ve seen) –  a group of disciples that want to see God move in radical ways among Atlanta and especially among the African American population.  They’re calling out casual cultural Christian and calling them to united families passionate about seeing redemption in the city.  They want to raise up leaders to unleash the gospel and who care about homelessness, and care about the youth and will take a stand against the idea of a broken family.  Their philosophy: “The Gospel changes people and people change the world…”

I was so encouraged to see these guys moving from Houston because they felt like God was calling them to Atlanta because they felt God stirring something here.  It’s so exciting!  At Midtown, we want to be committed to doing anything that they need to grow, so they may be using Grace Midtown on Saturday Night- Come on out.  It will likely be a night/service you won’t forget.

The original reason I wanted to post this one was simply to write out these lyrics because they are incredible, laced with scripture, powerful, and convicting.  I’ve posted the video first to hear it and then put on the lyrics at the bottom, you might enjoying doing both at the same time (shout out to a friend of mine- Tripp Crosby for the music video).  Do yourself a favor and crank this one.  Right after, I’ve included a video they showed in the beginning of the concert… goosebumps.  These guys love John Piper if that gives you any idea of their passion…

more about “Lecrae – Google Videos“, posted with vodpod

more about “DWML Sermon Jam - Google Videos“, posted with vodpod

 

DON’T WANNA WASTE MY LIFE…

Verse 1:

I know a lot of people out there scared they gone die/

couple of em thinking they’ll be livin’ in the sky/

but while I’m here livin’ man I gotta ask why, what am here fo I gotta figure out/

waste my life/

no I gotta make it count /

if Christ is real then what am I gone do about/

everything in Luke 12:15 down to 21/

you really oughta go and check it out/

Paul said if Christ ain’t resurrect then we wasted our lives/

well that implies that our life’s built around Jesus being alive/

everyday I’m living tryin’ show the world why/

Christ is more than everything you’ll ever try/

better than pretty women and sinning and living to get a minute of any women and men that you admire/

ain’t no lie/

We created for/

outta the dust he made us for/

Elects us and he saves us for/

Jesus comes and raises for/

Magnify the Father why bother with something lesser/

he made us so we could bless Him and to the world we confess him/

resurrects him/

so I know I got life/

matter fact better man I know I got Christ/

if you don’t’ see His ways in my days and nights/

you can hit my brakes you can stop my lights/

man I lost my rights/

I lost my life/

forget the money cars and toss that ice/

the cost is Christ/

and they could never offer me anything on the planet that’ll cost that price.

Verse 2:

Suffer/

Yeah do it for Christ if you trying to figure what to do with your life/

if you making a lot money hope you doing it right because the money is Gods you better steward it right/

stay focused if you ain’t got no ride/

your life ain’t wrapped up in what you drive/

the clothes you wear the job you work/

the color your skin naw you Christian first/

people living life for a job/

make a lil money start living for a car/

get em a house a wife kids and a dog/

when they retire they living high on the hog/

but guess what they didn’t ever really live at all/

to live is Christ yeah that’s Paul I recall/

to die is gain so for Christ we give it all/

he’s the treasure you’ll find in the mall/

Your money your singleness marriage talent and time/

they were loaned to you to show the world that Christ is Divine/

that’s why it’s Christ in my rhymes/

That’s why it’s Christ all the time/

see my whole world is built around him He’s the life in my lines/

I refused to waste my life/

he’s too true ta chase that ice/

here’s my gifts and time cause I’m constantly trying to be used to praise the Christ/

If he’s truly raised to life/

then this news should change your life/

and by his grace you can put your faith in place that rules your days and nights.

I must apologize to those who used to check this blog lately. You’d think that since I have such availability to computers I’d be blogging much more often. You’d think…

Being back has been tough, but the past few days has been just the shot in the arm that I needed. Coming from the feelings in the previous blog about struggling and fighting for a purpose while I’m home, I’d like to pick up where that left off.

This last weekend I was able to share with high schoolers at Sharp Top (great YoungLife camp up in Jasper, GA) how God was moving among the Muslim people.
The youth pastor arranged for me to have a break out session among 12 others. I asked what other break out groups there were. “Oh, you know like one for Dating, one for girls and one for guys, another for eating healthy and biblically….” Disheartened, I said I would enjoy the five students who came to learn about Islam. Well God blew me away with about 50 students. 8-10 were staying after asking question after question- so interested in the similarities and excited at the possibility at forging friendships with Muslims in their schools! Some of which may be coming to Jesus in the Qur’an coming up in September down at Georgia Tech!

Then Last Monday, a buddy of mine who works at Midtown asked me to come explain some of the kinds of conversations we’re having with our Muslim brothers and sisters here and overseas. The gentlemen was in charge of the young and missions at his small church; his plate was full. We met at Ruby Tuesday (I’ll be ok if that’s never in my diet again) and he was there with his son. I explained my trip to Turkey and began showing him how we study from the Qur’an and the Bible. His biggest concern was the concept of Allah- is this the same God as the God of Abraham? I went through the history of the word starting with

Hebrew: Elohim then…
Aramaic: Alaha (the language used in Passion of the Christ and what Jesus likely spoke in) and finally…
Arabic: Allah
If you were to ask a Syrian Christian, who speaks Arabic, who they pray to, they would say Allah in Isa al Masih’s (Jesus the Messiah’s) name.

To be technical the English word God comes from the a German word for a water god named :”got” -Hope you enjoy nibbling on your piece of humble pie as much as I did the first time I heard this…

This gentlemen was struggling in the same way his 13 year son was, but we believed that God was working on their hearts in a big way. The two of them were interested in visiting a Masjid (mosque) in Atlanta so we set out to find an open one. The problem was that is was the third day of Ramadan and we weren’t sure if we would find anyone to take us around. We stopped and prayed for 5-10minutes after finding one, then went up to the door- locked. We turn around and there is a guy pulling up.  A normal looking African American guy got out of the vehicle and asked if we needed anything. Wow, I just realized if we didn’t stop to pray, we would have left, not having met this guy.

He took us inside and showed us around, the two who had never been in a mosque- their eyes were wide open like saucers taking everything in as if they had been transported to a foreign country. Our new friend, Hakeem was essentially the head elder in the mosque and he was answering every question that they had for him. We then went through the Kingdom Circles (in process of writing a separate page explaining these things) and he really liked it and you could tell he was probably going to use it again since he informed us of his Christian relatives.

We soon left, the father and son- now having inherited the gift of an Arabic/English Qur’an and a perspective completely changed. Their fear gone, and now replaced with a burden of love.

One thing God has been teaching me this year is that we can’t reach out to someone we’re afraid of. Can you love someone you’re afraid of? I’m not talking about the kind of fear/respect you have for you dad the way he had authority to punish you- whatever that might be.  The closest example is having a healthy fear of God, who at the same time loves us. I am reminded of the conversation between Lucy and the beaver family as she is inquiring about Aslan in C.S. Lewis’ s The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe:

Is he – quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion.”

“That you will, dearie, and no mistake” said Mrs Beaver; “if there’s anyone who can appear before Aslan without their knees knocking, they’re either braver than most or else just silly.”

“Then he isn’t safe?” said Lucy.

“Safe?” said Mr Beaver; “don’t you hear what Mrs Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”

I say that to say to make a distinction between Godly fear and the fear of things/people we know very little about. The church has done a poor job reaching out to some partly because it’s afraid- am I wrong in saying this? More specifically, I believe the church has done a poor job reaching out to the homosexual community because they are afraid/don’t understand these people. The same fear is realized when we fear the fancy and well thought out rebuttals of atheists.

God calls us away from this fear, because He is the provider of a perfect Love that casts out ALL FEAR.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear….The one who fears is not made perfect in love.  1 John 4:18

Aren’t we supposed to love our neighbor (Luke 10:27)? Apparently, it’s number #2 on God’s list and the rest of His commands hinge on us loving God and loving others.  But, what if they’re different and not a Christian? All the more should our response be to those we don’t understand. Christ remind us that even evil doers love those who love them (Luke 6:32). As disciples of Christ, we are to be recognized by our Love (John 13:34-35)- the radical-doesn’t-make-any-sense kind of Love. If we’re not loving, then we’re fearing or slandering another and thus we are belittling God’s creation and in a sense saying “God, you made a mistake when you created these people…”

Do you realize how dangerous this road is?

As I’m writing this I realize my title has nothing to do with what I’m writing. I was going to call it “Pray it forward” – so clever, huh. I think I was more in love with the title than anything else. Last night an older guy from church told me he and his wife were praying for me a couple weeks ago for my time in Turkey. This is one of my favorite things that God does, it’s as if he sent me a letter in the mail that says: “Just thinking about you. I chose to use these people this time. Surprise… I love you!”  When someone, especially someone who doesn’t know you, reveals that they were praying for you, it’s one of the greatest things in the world.

Another time this happened to me when I was baptized. I heard this story later. I had been meeting at Chick-fil-A by myself for some time before this singles’ event at Northpoint Community Church called 722. Other groups were often there because everyone knows that Chick-fil-A is the official pre/post Bible study place. Well, this girl would see me alone and would pray for me each time. When I was baptized, this girl was standing next to someone who knew me and as my testimony was shown on the screen, the girl turned to the person next to her and was so excited as she whispered, “I’ve been praying for him for a long time!” To this day, I don’t know who that person was.

But isn’t that what we want to say? How awesome would it be in heaven to greet one another revealing how much you had been praying for them and then all the people who could say that about you.  The Kingdom of God- a body of believers who were committed to prayer for each others’ salvation and sanctification in Christ.

That’s why I want to challenge anyone who reads this to pray for our Muslim brothers and sisters during this time of Ramadan. Ramadan is a month of fasting (sun-up to sun-down; 5:30am to 8:30pm no food or drink) in which they celebrate Muhammad receiving the Qur’an and being enlightened that there is only One God. What if we could see a movement of people being further enlightened with the sacrificial love of Christ in this time? What if we could greet millions of people in heaven and give them a huge hug and whisper in their ear with tears of joy in our eyes, “… I was praying for you…”

Well, it’s almost been two weeks since I’ve been home and everything seems pretty much like I left it.  Jet lag going the other way is not near as bad as the other way, which is bad because blaming things on jet lag is convenient and a great way to pawn off responsibility.

For anyone who has been tracking with the blog, my trip was fantastic and after digesting a lot that had happened near the end, I am feeling better and better at stewardship of the time and the confidence that God will use relationships forged during our time to give dreams, visions, and more revelations of His love for our Muslim brothers and sisters.  I must trust that He is the Lord of the Harvest, not me, not Randy, not any church or group- but God, His Word (Christ), and His Spirit alone.  A verse was given to me this summer as one to memorize and it stuck with me so much, partly because I was supposed to memorize and I just couldn’t because it was so long and odd.  Near the end of my trip when my memorization hero Daniel challenged me on the beach just to keep trying, I finally got it.  I nearly cried partly because I believed the negative self talk that: memorizing just wasn’t for me and partly because the words had never been truer:

Though the fig tree may not blossom,
Nor fruit be on the vines;
Though the labor of the olive may fail,
And the fields yield no food;
Though the flock may be cut off from the fold,
And there be no herd in the stalls—
Yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will joy in the God of my salvation.
The LORD God is my strength;
He will make my feet like deer’s feet,
And He will make me walk on my high hills.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

Right now, I haven’t been home home for more than a day as I have been staying downtown at a incredible loft in Cabbage Town that a great guy let Matt Vaughan and I stay in (blessings to Mr. Matt Gibbons!).  It’s been a great time to decompress and dialogue with Matt how his trip was and how mine was as we’ve both gotten back from overseas.

Things have been so easy to slip back into… and I don’t like that.  I am fearful that what happened this summer will stay in Turkey instead of overflowing into what God is doing in Atlanta.  I still don’t have big plans job, school, and anything wise- but I’m trusting for provision and trusting in His vision for my steps.  It’s certainly been tough now that I’m back and people ask the polite “How was this summer?” and then the ever common “…so what’s next?”  Both are great questions and both I’m eager to know the answers to.

In the states, it’s so easy to slip into routine and let the routine determine your purpose in the day.  Now more than ever, I want my purpose to determine my routine.  I want God to plant my steps and place the divine encounters and provide for my needs.  I won’t stand by and let my life not count for something, I’ve given up too much and I’m prepared to give up more but the process of coming home from an intentional mission leaves day to day things with such a poor taste in my mouth.

I guess it’s why I’ve been camped here at the church yearning for community, yearning for something to do for the King, yearning to talk to those who don’t know about the Kingdom of God.  I’ve spent a lot of time trying to find out how to live down here, how to cultivate community, and how to bring those yearning for good news into what is going on in Atlanta and at Midtown Community (soon to be Grace Midtown fyi- sorry if that was supposed to be a secret.)

Although this may be jumping around a bit and disjointed, I’ve really been getting hit from all sides with death.  I really just wanted to address it and get it off my chest and rebuke the finality of it.  It also just confirms this urgency in my to share the Kingdom with others and God’s loving promises- regardless of how much love, forgiveness, and everything Christ stood for might offend people.

Before I left Turkey, we found out about a guy who had died visiting the spot where a famous Turkish Muslim used to pray.  In fact, we saw him go up the mountain, but after a lightning storm realized his car was still there.

On of the missionaries we met in Turkey was starting chemotherapy for prostrate cancer, no exactly you hear a lot of success about.  I’m so quick to tell God, “don’t take one of the few of your messengers off the field!”  But His plans are better….

Last week a guy who I meet with (or who meets with me I should say) told me that after beating cancer twice, he has bladder cancer.  He told me before the only reason God had kept him alive was to sow into other young men’s lives and I believe that’s true.  He told me that he’s not praying for healing, but rather for God’s glory.  If by his healing of cancer, people come to the throne of God- then so be it, but if more glory would come from him speaking from the other position, then may God be glorified.  He shared that he and his wife have great friends from Iraq and the father is battling cancer, so perhaps God organized a way of report so that they could better relate and he could share his hope of Christ with the family.

Another friend, Debby, is battling colon cancer and she might only be 33.  I read her updates on Caringbridge, a blog like site that she can update on her condition, and half the time it brings me to tears reading about her bold love in God, her trust in His will, and her boldness to proclaim it.

This morning I get a email from my team leader in Turkey and she informs me that the family’s apartment we stayed at; well, they were on furlough (break from the mission field).  The family(Colin & Lizyanet, and Rachel Berry), a couple and their 8 year old daughter were in a car accident in North Dakota killing the husband and the daughter.  The wife is still having various surgeries and perhaps doesn’t even know what has happened.  I can’t imagine.  I am so torn with anger and confusion.  My friend Matt pointed out the irony in people’s thinking that because you go to a Muslim country, you perhaps don’t value your life or have a death wish.  But here, God doesn’t promise us safety; but can we be ok with His Glory and His will?

I get a call today, that a friend’s mom just went home to heaven after battling cancer.  The girl whose mom died is named Crystal.  Her mom, trusted in Christ just last year- praise His name!

I urge you to stop and pray today.  God hears our prayers and He moves on behalf of them.  Pray for one of these families, pray for all of them.  Pray for understanding. Pray for healing.  Pray for glory.  Pray for your friends who don’t know the love of the Father.  Pray for His Kingdom to come and redeem those hearts that are mourning.

Death can not win, because death has already been beaten!

Well it’s been great this morning reflecting on this trip.  Writing this post with some NesCafe’ (foreign travelers unite around this instant coffee- surprisingly good) and listening to some Jesus Culture (the computer I’m borrowing has access to YouTube- praise His name; can’t wait for Midtown Community on Sunday night!).  That was a horrible sentence riddled with parenthesis- sorry.

Anyway, yesterday I sent off the remainder of the team to the United States.  It was tough packing up everything like I was going, go through a preliminary security and then not leave with them.  At the airport was Kadeer, who met us there at 8 in the morning (he woke up at 6:30 to see us off and take me to his place).  Mass transit during rush hour is fun with full luggage, oh by the way.  Kadeer let me sleep for a couple of hours and then we went to Friday prayer- like Sunday morning but with a message that is universal across all mosques in Turkey.  We then went to a mosque that Kadeer was really excited about with a lot of history.  Think of an overstuffed graveyard with a church in the middle of it.  Did I mention there were several tombs in the mosque 10 feet from where you pray?  Very different for me.  Grandfather clock…. Grandfather…. Grandmother…. door…. Check out pictures on flick’r soon.

As we left an old man stopped me, as they often do and said no american or ‘christian’ had ever been in that mosque and the informed me that Muslims love Jesus and the Injeel (New Testament) and the Tawrat (Old Testament).  There was long turkish convo that I was left out of that Kadeer would later tell me about.

After visiting another mosque that Kadeer couldn’t believe I hadn’t been too (the prettiest mosque ever- btw). We then went to Taxim- tourist area and young people part of Istanbul.  Here, Kadeer helped me buy some gifts, which were later stolen slash I left then somewhere- not surprising to those who know me; seriously stop laughing…  We then ate with some Americans who were studying with Kadeer at the prestigious Bosphorus University.  After some time, it was easy to see that a couple of these Americans were lost in a different way and seemed further from the Kingdom that most of our Muslim friends.  Their harsh language and superior attitude spilled out (as Kadeer confirmed later) and further cemented a perception of Americans our team was working to reshape.  I realized that while with them, I would need to wear two hats, because each group I was with needed the love of Christ desparately and I was to ‘become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.’ 1 Corinthians 9:22-23.

As Kadeer went with me in the evening (to look for my lost souveneirs), we talked about what he might want in a wife and I asked if he had ever dated a girl.  He said that his family knew best of his desires and didn’t care about looks, but that only that she would be submitted to Allah in such a way that would encourage him (Kadeer) to pursue the straight path.  Wow!  He then said dating, though practiced by many Muslims secretly, is not accepted.  He believes that it would only lead to broken hearts and rob his wife of intimacy. (Kadeer, would you mind coming to my church and speaking sometime??)  I told him of some of my past issues and what I hoped for in the future and then he said something really sad to me.

Paraphrasing: “You know, Natan, you’re not like many of the Christians I have met.  You accept our prophet, Muhammed, and I think you know the Qur’an better than me.”

-I believe that the writing of the Qur’an have and will lead people to Christ-  controversial, I know.

I explained that, yes, these ideas are not held by all; but that I can’t stand the thought of people spending the eternity away from Allah- in fact, I cry about this.  I went on to say that I am here to speak of peace and read the places where our Holy Books intersect, that through the prophets we are given the signs of Allah.  To me, it’s more important to follow Christ and that why, if my Turkish were good, I could ask Muslims what they think a Christian is.  Do you believe in 3 God’s- no…  Do you believe God had sex with Mary- no…. Do you think Muslims are terrorists…. no.  Some sad people are using Islam to wage terror, but these are not Muslims.

Kadeer told me the last time he was friends with a Christian they had all kinds of great conversations and then one day this Ethiopian Christian asked Kadeer: “Is your prophet still living?”… no “Was your prophet just a man?” …yes “Why are Muslims terrorists?” …loaded question…  Kadeer said he realized he couldn’t talk to that person anymore.  “Why do they only talk about their religion and not talk about Islam and if they do it’s only in the worst possible light?”

Something that has been ingrained in me from YoungLife is that people “don’t care what you know until they know how much you care.”  I see this played out fully.

Kadeer then said today the old man at the mosque was asking about me and I found out that Kadeer was vouching for me the whole time.  – Does he read the Qur’an… yes.  Does he honor and respect Muslims… yes.  Does he pray?… oh yes.  The old man had never heard of this and then happily said, “Oh, he’s a Muslim then!”  Haha!  In the Qur’an it calls Jesus’ disciples true Muslims- can’t say I’ve ever been so honored.

I know this is so random, but last night was great and I really saw the value of approaching our Muslim brothers and sisters in this way.  My goal is that they would trip over my love and love poured into me by Christ- the well that won’t run dry.  In the end, forget Christianity- consider following Jesus- who healed the blind, raised the dead, and cleansed the lepers.  The one who has authority over demons and became sin so that we might become the righteousness of God (2 Corithians 5:21).

The night ended, Kadeer led us in prayer, and then we talked about alcohol was what denominations (thank you Western Church ) were and the trouble with Pharisees and their making obsession with rules in order not break rules, and in that miss out on a relationship with Allah.  This is what Christ did as the coming King, not to overthrow the law, but the fulfill it.  Kadeer was fascinated by this idea of Grace that he has been dancing around for so long- a relationship with the creator of the Universe.

And a King who came for him…

I received this letter today and it literally blew me away.  It is a completely different thing going on in India led by one greatest man of God I have had the pleasure of meeting and serving with.  I met him last year while working with Cafe 1040 in North Africa.

This letter is encouraging, convicting, and is extremely offensive to the enemy.  I pray that it spurs you on to know there is a battle out there and men of God are going for it for the sake of the Kingdom.  Be challenged and above all PRAY!

Greetings in Jesus name, 

Dear brothers and sisters,

Thank you so much for your encouragement and prayers. They give us much strength and take us far. God has done mighty things among the people in this village over the past few weeks. We have many diff hindus come to the Bible study that we have in our room every night because their friends are going out into the village and telling them about what happened to them the night before, so they come with hunger and faith to believe the simple gospel we tell them. To repent from their sins and never again worship these false god’s and idols, but worship the only God, Jesus Christ alone. Chris and I looked at each other last night and realized that everyone in our room (about 20 people or so) were followers of Christ. A couple of weeks ago they were all dead in their sins and worshipping the hindu and Banjara gods. One thing I have seen to be true in the preaching of this simple and unwatered down gospel, is that the Holy Spirit is waiting to confirm His Word. He wants to confirm His Word. He will never confirm Ryan or Chris, but He will confirm His Word. For we have truly decided to know nothing among these people except Jesus Christ and Him crucified, that their faith may not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God (1 Cor 2:1-5).

This morning during the Church service some of the kids and some of the guys from the village came up and gave testimony of how Jesus had cast satan out of them and come to live in them the night before. After that Chris taught on faith and then I preached the gospel from 1 Timothy 1:13-17. It was Paul’s gospel and it’s mine. We noticed this older widow from the village come in and kneel down in the back. We saw that the Spirit was heavy upon her heart. After the message she came up front and immediately the scripture in Luke 13 about the woman with the disabling spirit came to my mind. She came up and said her body was hurting and she was in much pain. So Chris and I prayed for her, rebuked the disabling spirit, and commanded it to come out. She fell on the floor and started shaking, and a great reverence and fear of God came upon the people in the room. I fell on my face and worshipped Jesus for about 5 or 10 minutes and Chris did the same. Afterward I instructed everyone there, (about 100 people in all) who were gathered around her, to sing praises to Jesus over her as He delivers and heals her. She got off of the ground and testified of what Jesus had just done. She said that when she fell on the ground darkness came over her and she couldn’t see. She was seized with fear and began to shake. There was a great pain from her neck to the middle of her back as the demon came out of her. Afterwards she was filled with peace and joy for the Kingdom of God had come upon her and cast satan out (Colossians 1:13). Jesus also completely healed her back problems, the pain she had in her stomach, and the pain all over her body. We are so thankful for the intercession that is coming from the saints back home in America who lay on their faces before God and take us before His throne (Rev 8:3-5). He is surely answering them with fire, and we are being humbled. We are tired, sick, weak, drained physically, spiritually, and emotionally. But as Paul might say, we are bound in our weaknesses, but the Word of God is not bound. I am learning that God is truly most powerful when we are weakest. The power of the gospel is seen in the weakest and lowliest of lives. It is best magnified against the backdrop of man’s depravity. Jesus did not come to call those who are worthy, he came to give power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength” (Isa 40:29). “Blessed are the poor in spirit,” (Mat 5:3) the spiritually bankrupt, who know they have nothing to offer, but depend completely upon God. For such is the Kingdom of our God. Again, Thank you so much for your laboring for the kingdom of God through prayer and intercession.

Prayer Requests:

-We only have 7 days left to disciple leaders among these new disciples and get them into the groove of meeting and worshiping the Lord together before we leave and there is still teaching that needs to take place.

-We will be praying about and selecting leaders tonight to Shepherd this flock. Pray for the Holy Spirit to give us wisdom in making this decision and for God’s annointing to rest upon them and commission them for the work of the ministry.

-Pray that these new disciples we will be leaving behind are not persecuted or oppressed from fear of man. Chris and I have already been threatened that if we baptize these new believers, we will be arrested, put in jail, and banned from ever coming back to the country again. Please pray for them, for they live here in the midst of a stronghold of fear and death.

Pray for us. We are physically exhausted and need rest. We have prayer meetings in our room every night at 8 and mostly all of them are lasting throughout the night until early morning because new people are coming every night and want to know Jesus and we want to make sure they hear the true gospel and know the cost of following Jesus before they do so, and that takes some time. Also many who come are oppressed or possesed by demonic spirits from the worship of demons and idols, and need deliverance. And when we finally get finished to get a little sleep we battle with bugs and all kinds of diff creatures in our room and in our bed. Pray for rest and energy.

-Spiritual warfare is at what seems like a maximium at times and we need personal time alone with our Lord to dwell with Him in intimacy that we may do ministry. We will never have ministry and then intimacy for then we would be relying on ourselves instead of depending upon the living God. So we must first draw from the river of living water, being continuously filled. We live in an orphanage with 200 children so it’s very hard to get away from them for even a short time to spend time alone with our sweet Savior. Pray for God to grant us time alone in His presence. 

-Many of the children in the orphanage we are living in have leprosy and we make physical contact with them often so pray for our protection through faith. Also, I’ve been sick for about a week with something in my breathing and respritory, and lack of rest isn’t helping. Pray for my healing.

And bless the Lord o my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name!

The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you all,

Ryan

**Revelation 1:5-6**

Meet Ephesus…

Isn’t she beautiful?  This has no doubt been an incredible trip.  I have many more pictures just like this one to share, I’ll let you know soon.

While in Ephesus, we read Acts 18-20, the story of the revolt of the idol makers of Artemis (Diana).  We read it in this underground cave and imagined that we were with Paul and were fearing for his life and could hear the riot in the theatre out side of us- possibly 25,000 strong.  Artemis was a fertility goddess, so traces of her and objects based around sex was rampant in the ruins and in pictures of different statues.  This would lay the groundwork for many discussions.

Our Father has really blessed our team by traveling here with 2 of our Muslim brothers, Kadeer and Ismail.  They have been such a treat.  I only have a little bit of time, so I want to be quick.  Today, we had a chance to attend a church service, but forwent that to have our own little Holy Book study.  We were studying the sign of Moses and at the end, we talked about the idea that Allah provided a way of salvation by taking the blood of the lamb and painting over the household.  I asked the group what they most liked about this sign and I nearly teared up when Kadeer said, ” I loved the part where we talked about the idea that perhaps an Egyptian could have obeyed Allah and his son would have been spared.  I love that Allah did not take into account their pasts, and that he would forgive them even though they were Egyptians.”  Is this not the gospel coming to the Gentiles? to Muslims?

Each night we have been praying together as guys, sharing our struggles and interceding.  Ismail has had a bad back and the past two days it hasn’t hurt!  We’ve laid hands on his back praying in the name that heals the blind, cleanses the lepers and raised the dead- Isa al Masih (Jesus the Messiah).  Last night, Ismail was actually offended that Kadeer didn’t lay hands on him- haha I love it!

Today we went to a beautiful beach town on the Aegean Sea (Greece is also there- so you can imagine the beauty).  The past two days have been tough for all of us, having come from a more Muslim/conservative  area.  It’s not that Istanbul is conservative, it’s that the influx of tourists from the U.S and Europe is anything but.  It was so tough, seeing women and hoping they weren’t Americans and trying to understand why bikinis were acceptable clothing for observing ancient ruins.  Today as we were in the beach town, we couldn’t even look at the water because of the lack of clothing.  For much of the time we were looking for a private beach or a beach for men- to no avail of course.  Kadeer and Ismail desire purity so much, that they were seeking out places where they wouldn’t see women showing cleavage and skin- who am I?  During prayer, he asked if we thought it would be ok to ask if Allah would have more places for people like him to enjoy his creation, where he wouldn’t be subject to lust… seriously???  

I’m currently reading Ephesians and can’t believe that way it comes alive.  We’ve traveled around and seen hidden churches in the sides of mountains as this remnant of saints rise up against a society overtaken by lust and sex.  Sound familiar?

Think of how powerful this good news sounds to people like these… or even to people like us….

As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. 

 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Ephesians 2:1-10